It's the little things that count :-)

Last week I adopted 2 petite female cats, one of which is sick, but it has given my mother purpose, something to take care of and keep her company when she's in her bedroom. I'm slowly learning that my parents' wants and needs are so much more because of their health issues, but also so simple when it comes to loving my pets. It's always been an ongoing joke that my parents don't have grand-children, they have grand-dogs and grand-cats!!

At what age are they supposed to give up their independence?

The most difficult part of caring for my elderly parents is to know when they should no longer be independent and when I should step in and do everything for them, because they won't ask for help. And if they don't ask for help, that's when they can hurt themselves.

So I take it one day at a time, evaluate each day differently from the day before. Then step in and approach them carefully as to not offend them, especially my father. It's harder for him to give up his independence than it is for my mother.

Living with the parents . . . again!

After more than 30 years of being on my own and being married, living with the parents again has become challenging in itself, aside from the fact of trying to adjust and take care of their health issues, plus take care of my husband's needs. And, the blending of families (my parents, with my husband and his kids) has been the worst experience of my life, and theirs! It's very hard to have "me time" and still take care of everyone.

Independence after a stroke:

My father, even after 5 strokes (since 2003), continues to be independent even when I think he shouldn't. But he has the drive and determination so I have to remember that if he falls, there's nothing I can do personally to prevent it, but continue to remind him the techniques that he learns daily from the physical therapist. Because the upside of this, he is still mobile and not bed-ridden!!